February 2010
I officially believe that tonight’s Grammy Awards needed way more Lady Gaga. Or at least some crazy Kanye antics.
It was like Buffy the Vampire Slayer without Cordelia (and prior to Spike) because it was all, oh, isn’t this wonderful, Taylor Swift is phenomenal, we’re going to cut off everyone’s acceptance speeches so we can go on for 28 minutes about how you...
Mom: Who is that singing now? I can't see anyone's mouth moving? Who's singing?
Me: That's Michael Jackson's voice, Mom.
I am really annoyed that my dad is watching a stupid Steven Seagal movie and won’t just let me watch the damned Grammies.
It could just be me, but I don’t want to see the people who wanted to be on TV, dancing to the Blackeyed Peas.
I would rather watch the team, thanks.
Silversun Pickups?? They’ve been around for a while …… Oh, well.
I really just sounded like an elitist hipster right there.
“My husband is so dreamy. We should be making more beautiful babies right now....”
– Heidi Klum’s Brain
Who????
bluebears:
Lady Antebellum? Is that a country group?
Yeah, they’re pretty big down here in the ‘Ville. I personally don’t care for them, but then I’m not really that much of a country fan.
Ok
bluebears:
I put on the Grammys. Beyonce is singing Alanis? Is this like Grammy takes a look back?
I was thinking the same thing.
For some reason, I absolutely hate Beyonce’s “If I Were a Boy.”
And I am not a fan of her weird gladiator-esque dress she’s wearing.
January 2010
I am so fucking upset that I was busy studying instead of watching John Hamm on SNL last night. Stupid getting smarter.
I have decided to go with AT&T instead of Verizon, and I believe my family thinks I’m committing some sort of mutinous act.
So apparently a guy I knew in middle and the first part of high school tried out for American Idol. I don’t know if he made it or not - although according to one article I found, he did, but you can’t believe everything you read on the interwebs - but there’s a Facebook group and everything supporting him. And I was invited.
As far as I remember, he was an asshole. He spent his...
One thing I really hate: doing the dishes. I don’t wanna sound all whitewhine or whatever, but seriously, this shit is ridiculously …. ugh. I can’t even come up with a proper synonym describing why I hate doing the dishes.
http://g4tv.com/games/xbox-360/50298/mass-effect-2/... →
Gah, Mass Effect 2 looks awesome.
Looks like I’m gonna be poor in 2010. (I’ve already preordered Final Fantasy XIII, putting aside moolah for Halo: Reach and The Force Unleashed II.)
“Hey, you’re single, I’m widowed. Let’s get married. I get...”
– Crazy Shit I Hear Every Damned Day
(This was actually kind of cute, but then again, I love little old men.)
junglejustine:
I wish I could just get liposuction sometimes. I can’t lie. Doing this naturally gets to be a pain in the butt.
Trust me, I’m going through the same thing. I looked at my stomach yesterday and I was like, “Oh, maybe a bit of lipo wouldn’t be such a bad thing.”
In the end, I hope the “working out and eating better” thing will make me feel more...
The Fitness Made Simple guy freaks me the hell out.
It was so freaking cold in my house last night that it took four blankets to make it warm enough for me to be able to sleep. And that is with Zola as my little doggie radiator.
Needless to say, thank God it’s Saturday.
Training for My New Job
Ms OCD Crazypants: Wait, wait, wait!!!
Me: What? What, did I do something wrong???
Ms OCD Crazypants: You want to go to the next line and start there. You can't have your title and position on the same line as the first word of your report.
Me: Ms OCD Crazypants, this is for my records. What does it matter how I have it written if I can understand what's being said?
Ms OCD Crazypants: It's easier to read.
Me: Yes, for you. For me, I think the paragraph form is simpler.
Ms OCD Crazypants: Well, fine, but don't come crying to me when you can't read your own handwriting.
Me: This is on the computer. And I'm typing.
Ms OCD Crazypants: Whatever. You're still wrong.
I loathe Secret’s advertising tag line: because you’re hot.
Um, no. Sometimes I’m not.
Your glands are on the adventure of their lives!!! →
“I think I’m going to name my baby Raven Storm if it’s a girl. Or...”
– Crazy Shit I Hear Every Damned Day
“I’m bipolar and I don’t like people, so I shouldn’t have to...”
– new feature known as “Crazy Shit I Hear Every Damned Day”
Mom's Done It Again
My mother habitually gets angry with a company and boycotts them for a certain amount of time, usually the time it takes for her to realize that what they did in the first place was, in retrospect, not that bad.
Take Disney. She wouldn’t let my sister and I watch Disney movies or go to Disney World because of the company’s support of gay rights. Then she figured, well, if they can...
Rant
Okay, so I love LOLCats. I do. I think it’s absolutely adorable when you are referring to how you suspect cats and/or dogs might speak if given the opportunity. (I personally believe my bulldog, Zola, speaks with a baby, slightly lispy British accent.)
But for the love of GOD, stop using it in non-picture captioning. I refuse to read the comments on ICanHasCheezburger because I get...
"I'm Blackyver." →
SQUEEEEEE! (That is all.)
“I’ve got a perfect body ‘cause my eyelashes catch my sweat. Yes,...”
– Regina Spektor is gloriously weird
I think I’m a pretty awful person by wanting to order delivery Chinese when my driveway is coated in ice.
But I really want a freaking eggroll and egg drop soup.
Sigh …….
(Exposition: Me in the kitchen last night and mother-person in the living room)
Mom: Can you come here?
(I get up from studying A&P to do her bidding)
Me: Yes?
Mom: Can you turn off the TV?
Me: Mom, you have the controller.
Mom: Oh, well, here. (holds the controller in my direction)
Me: .....
"I was acutely aware that you are a Jew." →
I cracked up at this when I watched it on TV and I am still giggling as I write this. Ha. Wyatt Cenac, everybody.
“Seriously, what is this shit?”
– Boss J (in response to our state office closing due to snow today)
So as a first entry, this is kinda blah. It’s eleven thirty-effin-eight in the evening and I have to get up in about six hours because of some maladjusted ideology I have about having the perfect, in fit body.
I would love to look like this but this is my dream:
But I digress.
Posts, I promise, will get mucho mucho supremo. I am exceptionally tired and have procrastinated for too long.
...
